Just some crazy quotes. I will update periodically...Enjoy!
- May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. -- George Carlin
- For three days after death, hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off. -- Johnny Carson
- I get paid weekly. Very Weekly! -- Anonymous
- Always borrow money from a pessimist. He wont expect it back! --Oscar Wilde
- Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.--Robert Bloch
- First the doctor told me the good news, I was going to have a disease named after me.--Steve martin
- The only mystery in life is why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets.--Al Mcguire
- Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.--Billy Sunday
- If sex were shoes, I would wear you out. But, I wouldn't wear you out in public.--Jarod Kintz
- I married your mother because I wanted children. Imagine my disappointment when you arrived.--Groucho Marx
- I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.--Steve Martin